Life goes on...

Well, what an awful month of May I had. Its awful. The month I cried the most in my life besides my baby days.

It was a awesome six months with my boy. Its half a year alright! And he was my first. Whats more important is, we had love in between to tie us. Then the 7th month came, where he didn't want to wish us on our 7 months. And it's where i sense something. Talked to him the next day(Saturday), he didn't want to reply. On Sunday, He told me he need a break. I got shocked. WHAT IN THE WORLD HAPPENED?

And a month later, i ask if he wanted us to split, with avoiding the question from me a few times and denying he have no idea what to say, he ended up saying ' let's just be like friends'. I asked him why, he said, 'nothing, i just want to see what will happen'. Leave me hanging.

Sometimes, life is just like that isn't it? You don't like to put trust to it, but when you do, you do it with a lot of courage and you trusted it full heartedly, and there was hope. But when all this fall apart without warning, ouch. Doesn't it make you feel like a failure? And those trust were your strength too and it brings happiness. WHY IT HAPPENED? It's just life isn't it. I'll be stronger next time, IF i still have the courage, the trust, the hope received, the happiness i will get. Not a stab on the heart, not the tears that won't seem to stop falling, not the failure feeling. It hurts, it just hurt without warning. How much more courage could i give? How much more trust can i give to people? How much more strength will i have? All for this thing call happiness? I do not know. But i hope i still have it, not soon i will receive it, but i will gain back my courage, trust, and hope just for my happiness, just for the sake of living.


So what happened if my boyfriend dumped me? Life goes on. He don't give a damn! Why should i? But i will , cuz my heart is not cold. I'll be nice, i'll be nicee...